Awakening!

Let me respectfully remind you
Life and death are of supreme importance.
Time passes swiftly by and opportunity is lost.
Each of us must awaken. Awaken, take heed!
Do not squander your life!

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I’ve never felt comfortable with the word “enlightenment” as it sounded like it describes a state once attained persists statically, yet I’ve seen too many supposed “enlightened masters” act in pretty reprehensible ways, and all too many others making excuses for them! It wasn’t until I heard Thich Nhat Hanh respond to a questioner at a retreat I attended in 1992 that the deeper reason I was critical of the notion of such “enlightenment” became clear to me. A yogi had asked the question, “What is enlightenment?” and without missing a beat, Thay responded, “Enlightened about what?”
 
This response lit something in my mind as the memory of my first yoga teacher, Sw. Satchidananda had described yoga as “relationship.” When we speak about “enlightenment” as a state of being, it sounds atomistic and apart and distinct from all other phenomena, just as Patanjali describes Purusha as isolated in kavalya, having nothing to do with Prakriti and I intuitively resisted such dualism. As Thay pointed out, we are enlightened about particular things and so we can think of it not as a state but as a relationship.

This is why I have long preferred the term “awakening.” After all, buddh means “to awaken” and a buddha is simply someone who is awake. But we are always awake to someone, something, or some experience. And when you think about it, awakening is something we all have experience with! Awakening is even commonplace!  For most of us (other than those who work the night shift), we awaken each and every morning and will continue to do so until the morning that we don't! And if we think about those morning awakenings, we see that awakening itself is dependently arisen: not all awakenings are the same because we are awakened by different experiences and in different ways!

Some mornings we awaken to the sound of an alarm clock which can be quite loud and brash while others are more calming. Other mornings we may awaken to a loud street noise such as the sound of garbage cans clanging against the garbage truck. Such awakenings may be somewhat painful or at least unpleasant. They may also be a bit shocking as we awaken with a startle and still somewhat in a sleep-haze stumble to turn off the alarm clock or bury our heads under the pillow.

On those mornings where we can “sleep in,” we may not set an alarm clock but just sleep till we naturally awaken. Such awakenings can feel gradual, as if we are emerging from a submerged state or out from under a heavy weight. We may awaken with a clear mind or one that remains a bit hazy. And then there are the times when our puppy or kitten wakes us up with their insistent pawing, kneading, or barking and meowing!
 
And throughout our practice life, we have awakened in parallel ways. There have been times when the awakenings are harsh, as when the zen master shouts or clangs the bell at 4 AM. There can be these apparently disjunctive awakenings when the resolution to a kung-an or hwadu becomes crystal clear suddenly and unexpectedly. And there are awakenings that seem to slowly dawn on us over the course of hours, days, months or years. There are those awakenings that occur apparently spontaneously, as in those stories of monks awakening while sweeping and a pebble strikes a bamboo.

The thing is, awakening always happens in relationship. It has the quality of an “ah-ha” mixed with an “oh!” that transforms our vision and relationship to whatever situation within which the awakening occurs. And then the real work begins!

It is true that awakening can be sudden. It’s also true that it can be gradual. And whether it is sudden or gradual, the cultivation of that awakening must follow or we fall into the error of assuming we are “enlightened” as if it’s an unchanging state. Chinul, the great Korean Seon master had several awakenings spurred by passages from books. But he didn’t just sit with those awakening experiences; he then applied the truths he awakened to in all his other life experiences and relationships. As he put it, there was a sudden awakening followed by a gradual cultivation that led to true and deep transformation.

And the fact that we awaken every morning points to something else we must remember: In every and any moment, we have the opportunity to awaken! It may be a pleasant or unpleasant experience; it may be in response to something intentional that we do, or it may be in response to something completely unplanned and spontaneous. The reality is that with each and every breath we can awaken into this moment, and this moment…. as long as the breath is taken with full attention and discernment. After all, it was anapanasati, mindfulness of the exhalation and inhalation, that Siddhartha was practicing when he awakened to the realities of existence: everything – the world, other beings, our experiences and us ourselves – is always, ceaselessly changing. While it seems to us that the world and our experiences seem to be substantial, lasting things, in fact all is in constant flux. We see ourselves as a thing standing outside of this process (like Purusha stands outside of Prakriti) mistaking what is really a process for a thing, an entity. And this misperception leads to a confused belief in the substantiality of ourselves as an independent, persistent, autonomous entity (self/atman) leading to a dysfunctional relationship with the process.

Let me respectfully remind you
Life and death are of supreme importance.
Time passes swiftly by and opportunity is lost.
Each of us must awaken. Awaken, take heed!
Do not squander your life!

Here is a ten-minute introductory meditation on the first tetrad of the anapanasati-sutta which begins with breath awareness and moves to both full-body awareness and calming the body. I offer it freely and hope it inspires you to practice.

If this and any of the other blog pieces have been helpful in supporting your practice, please consider making a dana offering. Currently, I am still in the midst of paying off my cancer treatment debt so know that it is to that your dana will be going.


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